Issue link: http://ncumarketing.uberflip.com/i/944766
"In each of my friends there is something that only some other friend can fully bring out. By myself I am not large enough to call the whole man into activity; I want other lights than my own to show all his facets... Hence true Friendship is the least jealous of loves. Two friends delight to be joined by a third, and three by a fourth, if only the newcomer is qualified to become a real friend. They can then say, as the blessed souls say in Dante, "Here comes one who will augment our loves." For in this love "to divide is not to take away." C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves (1960) A number of years ago, I conducted a focus group consisting of therapists as a supervision exercise to reflect on their stories on what it was like to be a client, and how the stories of their clients helped them to make sense of themselves as therapists (West, 2001). In this process, one of my goals was to challenge the dominant story in our culture of 'possessive individualism' (Shotter, 1989), the view that we all, including supervisors and those we supervise, are "living in psychological isolation from one another, engaging only in commercial relations with each other… The individual [is] seen as the owner of himself" (Shotter, 1989, p. 136). Shotter proposed a 'counter-text' "in which 'you', rather than "I" that assumes the leading role - which entails a shift from an individualistic to a communitarian perspective (Shotter, p. 137). In other words, identity exists in relationships, and does not belong to ourselves alone (see C.S. Lewis quote above). As such, it may be an enriching adventure to engage in a conversation with your supervisees related to their MFT Supervision: An Invitation to Reflexivity stories about their clients. Then ask them to consider how those stories invite them to story about themselves. Additionally, perhaps engage them in conversations about what they think it means to be a supervisor and how those stories may invite them to position themselves as supervisees. Finally, it might be great to offer some of your own stories of how you view supervisees and how that impacts your work as a supervisor. This focus group was an amazing experience, and it invites me to wonder if it may be an enriching adventure for you to engage in a conversation with your supervisees in their stories about their clients. The next step might be to ask them to consider how those stories invite them to story about themselves. As a third step, perhaps invite your supervisee(s) to engage in conversations about what they think it means to be a supervisor and how those stories may invite them to position themselves as supervisees. Finally, it might be great to offer some of your own stories of how you view supervisees and how that impacts your work as a supervisor. Lewis, C.S. (1960). The four loves. New York: Harcourt, Brace. Shotter, J. (1989). Social accountability and the social construction of 'you'. In J. Shotter and K. Gergen (eds.), Texts of Identity, pp. 133-151. London: Sage. West, C. (2001). Reflecting on therapist narratives regarding 'clients' and 'therapists'. The Clinical Supervisor, 19:2, 71-83. Chuck West, PhD Full-Time Faculty Department of Marriage and Family Sciences